I write to remember who I was. Who I am - the events, different thought processes that shape me. I have changed so much throughout these 7 - 8 months. I've written far less due to the lack of time, and the lack of insecurity (writing driven by the fear of forgetting, not driven by inspiration or realisation).

Changed so fast that I cannot remember what exactly made me less emotional, more able to gain control over myself, more comfortable with who I am (perhaps, confidence), less insecure, less fearful. [future self: note that I am writing positive things about myself at this moment. I am feeling good at *this* moment, and this is probably who I wanted to be. But I know there are more things to be understood about myself, to make life a -happier- one, without forcing anything out]

I will be able to remember what happened before and after the period of change, but not the change (metamorphosis) itself. I will be able to remember who were the ones watching me, for they are like the only constants.

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Language shapes thinking. This reminds me of broun, and this reminds me of the plain fact that I was "just insecure". You watched me. You don't know who I really was, just the remnants (though the root of all my problems surfaced).